Lately I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about home. How excited I am to see my Mom and Dad, because after playing with orphans all day I have a new appreciation for them. I’ve been thinking about how nice it will be to just be able to drive somewhere by myself, and rock out to country music by myself, and get Starbucks, BY MYSELF. I’ve been thinking about how stoked I am to go to college and start learning again, so I can remember how to do basic math.
Tonight I was thinking about all these things and more while listening to music. It’s one of the rare moments when I’m the only one in our room so I don’t have to use headphones, which is real nice. No, I’m not listening to Jesus Music at the moment, but Country music to get a little taste of that Texas life that I love so much. The song “Home” by Phillip Phillips came on and it got me thinking. I am oh so excited to go home, but I don’t really know where home is anymore. Yes, my physical home lies in the greatest state ever, Texas, but as of right now The Philippines is my home.
That’s not because I’ve been living here for the past 2 months, or because I’ll still be living here for the next month and a half. Not because I am experiencing my Birthday here or because my two favorite holidays happen while I’m living here. This place is my home because of the amazing children that stole my heart. Every night that I get to spend with my 29 angels is such a blessing. Putting them to bed and hearing them say “Tita, pray for me!” just warms my heart. I am so lucky that God put me here in this place.
Sometimes I think about how easy we have it here in the PI. I read the blogs about how expedition girls haven’t showered in months and I’m over here playing with kids and eating 3 square meals a day (and going on the occasional McDonalds run). But then I think about how these kids NEED love. They NEED to feel important and while I might not feel like I’m doing anything special, I know that it means the world to them when I hang out with them.
So I don’t know what it will be like going “home” again. I know it will be nice to not find nasty bugs in my hair every day, or have to chase rats out of our room, but how can I go through my life at “home” when my heart will be here with my kids? We still have a month left, but it’s already breaking at the thought of leaving.
