After a few hours in the Atlanta airport and a couple more in a yellow school bus, we rolled into a heavily wooded retreat center in northern Georgia, with the warmth and humidity of a jungle. Over the few days that we were there things were crazy. The craziness was associated with learning new things about the mission field and our destinations (as there were six different groups training simultaneously), meeting our group members and not being notified of the day’s activities.
For me, these days were also significant because through all this learning and training the prospect of leaving for three and a half months began to hit me. The decision to go on a mission trip was certainly a leap. The idea of a mission trip abroad itself is daunting, but knowing that I would soon be in Manila added to this anxiety.
My expectations for this training were incomplete. The only thing that I knew we would do was a corny name game that actually didn’t end up happening. The reason for these incomplete expectations was because of the limited information that was shared with us. I didn’t mind because knowing what to expect can be overwhelming and cause for being nervous. Simultaneously, being left in the dark certainly required constant flexibility from all of us, possibly by design. Since mission work is rarely rigid due to ever changing needs and available resources, flexibility will be crucial over these next months.
Despite not knowing exactly what to be concerned about, the thought of how long I will be in Manila was in the back of my mind. On the first day of training I told people that I was excited to go to a place in need of God’s love and be there solely to serve Him with others who had similar mindsets. Over the next few days I often revisited this idea, except as the weight of the trip began to hit me the excitement gave way to anxiety. I couldn’t help but think, “Am I going to be able to maintain my servant’s heart and focus for 3.5 months?” Mission work is difficult, and I knew my time abroad would be challenging both spiritually and physically, so while most people were saying out loud, “I’m not afraid,” I was thinking to myself, “I am afraid.” However, every time the thoughts began to weigh on me, someone would approach me with encouragement and prayer. It was amazing, as if they knew what I was feeling. These people helped remind me that I can and must depend on God for everything because He will not give me more than I can handle. There is so much going through my mind that it can be easy to forget a simple truth such as this. My time abroad will not always be joyful and fun, but when things do disintegrate hopefully I will be able to remember that promise from God.
